If you carefully inspect the above image you will see a signed copy of my new book, five (yes, FIVE!) signed bookmarks, a sheet of Jack Samsonite stickers, and a JS badge! And if that doesn’t excite you, then there are just three things you need to do to get your giddy-juices flowing:
- Pretend you have heard of me, have read my book and love it.
- Pretend you are 7 years old, and this is a prize on your favourite Saturday morning TV show.
- Remember that this collection of booty could really come in useful for when you are wrongly imprisoned in a case of mistaken identity as a Guatemalan land-pirate and need to make a hasty escape by sticking one prison guards eyelids shut (GO STICKERS!), stabbing Prison Guard #2 in the nipples (GO BADGE!), then flying to your freedom in (what will later see you make two entries into the Guinness Book of World Records for…)the (1) fastest ever constructed (2) worlds largest paper aeroplane (GO 400 PAGES OF UNREAD BOOK!). Until that day comes you can just leave them on a shelf and wonder if you should have just Ebay-ed them on day one.
You have just two days in which to enter this mindblowing competiton! To do so you just need to sign in to/up for your Twitter account, find my tweets, then ReTweet one of my #JackSamsonite tweets. (This is the bit where, if I was an annoying tit who quotes crap insurance ads, I would write ‘Simples!’). Simples!
A few other posts you might find interesting: